clock menu more-arrow no yes mobile

Filed under:

Prince Sidon is engaged, and we are not OK

Who the fuck is Lady Yona?

Prince Sidon throws up his arm with a big dumb grin in The Legend of Zelda: Tears of the Kingdom Image: Nintendo EPD/Nintendo via Otto Mankitap

[Ed. note: This post contains spoilers for Prince Sidon’s quest line in The Legend of Zelda: Tears of the Kingdom.]

Let it be known: Prince Sidon, the heir to the Zora throne and defender of Hyrule, is betrothed to a Zora named Yona. That’s right, the Zora prince with a heart of gold and gorgeous, gorgeous fish abs is no longer single. As of May 12, the release date of The Legend of Zelda: Tears of the Kingdom, he is canonically (and happily) engaged.

Please, let’s all hold a moment of silence for you and for me.

The Legend of Zelda: Tears of the Kingdom is the recently released sequel to Breath of the Wild. As a direct follow-up to Breath of the Wild, it brings back a lot of familiar characters from the first game, in addition to introducing new faces. Prince Sidon is among the characters who make a return, but it appears he’s been getting busy in the time between the two stories. In Breath of the Wild, Sidon and Link successfully tamed the living walking war machine known as Divine Beast Vah Ruta and wielded it to defeat Calamity Ganon and save Zelda.

Now, trouble is brewing again, and Link arrives at Zora’s Domain only to see its once-pristine waters polluted with muck. Not long after entering the domain, Link meets a woman named Lady Yona, a green Zora whose head resembles that of a manta ray. She tells us she is our best friend Sidon’s fiancée. According to her in-game profile, she has been Prince Sidon’s friend since birth, and she’s a match for “Sidon’s selfless compassion, [and] she dedicates herself to helping the citizens of the domain.”

An image of Yona in The Legend of Zelda: Tears of the Kingdom. Lady Yona is a green Zora whose head resembles that of a manta ray.
Public enemy No. 1.
Image: Nintendo EPD/Nintendo via Otto Mankitap

No shade to Lady Yona, but I’m calling bullshit. Why? Because I simply can’t accept that Sidon is no longer single — and many other fans can’t, either. Now, TikTok is filled with dozens of people lamenting the loss of Hyrule’s most eligible bachelor.

My personal favorite video uses a popular audio clip from South Park to roleplay a scenario in which Link and Sidon are together, but Yona is unaware that Sidon is gay.

Over the years, fans have built up a thirst for Sidon that not even all the water in Lanayru could quench. People have exploited glitches in the game so that they can ride Sidon everywhere, and have even conducted speedruns with the sole intention of mounting the Zora prince as quickly as possible. Why are people so obsessed with him? Well, if I’ve learned anything from smutty art on Tumblr and DeviantArt, people just really like his... personality. He’s tall — like, really tall; maybe almost double the size of Link. And because of this, he’s a pillar of the warriors fighting to protect Hyrule, and a pillar of stunning and thirsty Zelda fans.

To add insult to injury, Sidon isn’t single and he also isn’t dating Link. Even in meeting Lady Yona, the developers seem to dangle the Link and Sidon romance right in front of our faces. In the center of Zora’s Domain, there’s a giant statue depicting Link riding the prince, and as Link talks to Yona, she says that she’s heard Sidon talk about Link “nearly every day” since she arrived.

It’s devastating, but at the very least fans can now take solace in the fact that we get a much hotter version of Ganondorf.

Update: This article has been edited to include more fan reactions to Sidon’s betrothal.

Sign up for the newsletter Sign up for Patch Notes

A weekly roundup of the best things from Otto Mankitap